Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
