Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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