He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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