well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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