What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
