we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
