is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
