If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Where is the hickey?
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
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