i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize