You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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