Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
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