you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
At least make sure they are 18
Why
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
