State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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