i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
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