At least make sure they are 18
Why
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Randomize
