We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
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