I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
