she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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