My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
