Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
