i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Come see our sink grown plant.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
