this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize
