Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
What a dumb baby whore.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize