Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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