Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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