No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
sarcasm needs its own font
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize