Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize