She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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