Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
