I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
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