I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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