..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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