I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Randomize
