taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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