I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Randomize
