this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
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