Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Please don't give away my fajitas
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
