Do you still have your period?
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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