I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
