when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Randomize
