speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
The uberlube is also flammable
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
is that a dick in a sweater?
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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