yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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