My hair reeks of homosexuality.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
