I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
She announced her abortion via fbk
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
