The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
