I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
i just google imaged poop.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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