Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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