He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Randomize
