There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
