new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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