it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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