she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
sick fucks of a feather flock together
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
